I was anxious about breastfeeding a newborn whilst looking after a toddler By Faye Stafford
Breastfeeding first time around was difficult
After an unsuccessful yet emotional breastfeeding journey with my son Zachary, when I got pregnant again ten months after he was born I was determined things would be different.
I was so nervous and anxious second time around though. Would I be able to love another baby as much as my son? What if he got jealous? How would he cope if mummy was breastfeeding a newborn all the time? How could I make sure he didn’t feel left out ? So many questions and thoughts raced through my head through the whole pregnancy. I made it my mission though to keep him involved in the pregnancy. We talked a lot about the bump and let him rub my belly a lot. We read him the new baby sister book, and when we found out we were having a girl referred to her by name to get him used to having her around.
I was worried when I was pregnant
What worried me the most was he was such a loving boy. This isn’t a bad thing of course but he liked to be cuddled to sleep even when he was having a nap. How would I manage that with a crying newborn? How would we cope? Would he adapt to the change. I found towards the end of the pregnancy my husband did a lot of the night time routine. I read the story but didn’t always put him to sleep as I started to struggle bending over his cot with my baby bump!
My second baby was born
I needn’t have worried about his reaction to her being born! Once she was born he seemed to love her instantly. Wanted to cuddle and hold her straight away.
He was only 18 months though when she was born and was only just walking unaided and was still really unsteady on his feet. I needed eyes in the back of your head! I’m not going to lie those times were stressful but I somehow managed.
I loved how he enjoyed pretending to read to her as he babbled away.
Breastfeeding my second baby
When my daughter was born she had a shallow breastfeeding latch and I struggled to feed for the first few weeks and my best position then was lying down. I’d put my son in his cot with his favourite toys and that worked for a while, like a playpen. Once he was a bit older I got him things to distract/occupy him like sticker books! He loves those and for me they were a godsend.
My breastfeeding journey continued past all the milestones. I initially set a 6 month one, which I changed to 12 months and then somehow this continued until just before she started school at 3 years and 3 months.
During my maternity leave I became a volunteer for the B.O.O.B.S project (be open on breastfeeding in Salford), and was part of their fundraising breastfeeding calendar. This really helped me gain in confidence and gain new mummy friends. You can see more about this project on the BOOBS Facebook page
He is still such a loving brother even now, and they are 4 and 6 years old. He always watches out for her and plays with her, even if its something he doesn’t want to play.
I’m not going to lie, we call her boss baby! She rules the roost and her brother literally idolises her and she bosses us all around. I love the fact that we bought them a beanbag each but she would rather share his and snuggle up to him.
Having two children 18 months apart may have been hard initially but it’s truly the best thing we ever did! They are truly best friends and however long that lasts I know as parents we enjoy watching their friendship blossom every minute.
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